The Fish Market

Chef Damo says: 2 saute pans

     This restaurant is in a super cool location.  Right on the river in San Mateo, which is just south of San Fransisco.  We took an outside table as the evening was still warm and the scenery was excellent.  That is until I looked at the table next to us where a woman was breast feeding her child.  I'm not kidding. Straight up after dinner suckling going on 10 feet from were I hoped to have a lovely meal.  I wanted to check out the river and the houses on the other side, however I decided to stare at my table until the awkward warm milk dessert was finished, and the family of inappropriateness left.  After this disgusting display was over I was able to have a look around and enjoy the beautiful surroundings.  If you had a boat you could pull right up to the dock and stop in for a meal or coacktail, very cool. 

     Orderd up a glass of wine for the B, and a dozen oysters to try. We got two each of the six they offered.  The oysters came and were all delicous, clean and fresh.  They came with a nice bit of shredded horseradish, which we both enjoyed.  We get oysters quite a bit, the B likes them, I have alterior motivives in mind when ordering them but this isn't Playboy so I will say I enjoy them for their taste as well.  They had Kumomoto which are my favorite oyster, so I was happy.

If I thought an unwanted breast feeding was awkward what happened next truely stumped me.  I ordered the sea bass, hoping for a delicate, buttery, and flaky fish.  I was brought a steak of what I assume was swordfish.  It was ok, and I like swordfish but I had my stomach set on sea bass.  The fish was over cooked and I decided to get a couple beers to wash it down.  I didn't return the fish as I was hungry and didn't feel like waiting for the meal to be re-cooked.  For my two sides I went with the cheesy potatoes and the mixed vegatables.  The vegatables were just barely cooked, hard and crunchy.  I'm not sure what was happening in the kitchen, it was either an off day, or it was bring your kid to work day and some 10 year old punk cooked my dinner.   

     Dessert time and the warm peach crisp ala mode sounded good.  When the dessert came it looked like it was swimming in a mini pool of butter.  Dont get me wrong, butter, sugar, peaches, and ice cream it was a fatty dream come true.  I think the dish could have been put together better, but I won't tell you we didn't finish it.  I think the B was alternately spooning up butter and ice cream, and the bowl went back spotless.

     Overall this was a bust.   Great view, good oysters, not what I ordered for dinner, and a free show that I would have rather skipped.

The Bitch says: 3 middle fingers

We found the Fish Market close to our hotel in San Mateo.  It was the second night of our vacation and we weren't up to an hour long drive to get dinner in San Francisco.  When we showed up the place was poppin.  Parking lot was packed and so was the dining room, which is usually a good sign.  However the parking lot at Chili's is packed on a Friday night and I'd say that's not an indicator of good food.  Unfortunately, it was not a good indicator at the Fish Market.  Overall the food wasn't inedible, but it certainly lacked composition and refinement.

We opted to sit outside so we could have a nice view of the river, we both love the water.  Instead we got a view of some mom-bitch's tits.  From the looks of it, this baby was getting a better meal than we were about to.  The father at the table was incapable of controlling their other child who was fortunately old enough to enjoy solid foods, but too young to know that screaming is not polite table manners.

I ordered a glass of Kim Crawford Sav Blanc, my good old stand by.  I was too distracted by the circus freak sideshow next to us to properly review the wine menu so I went with what I know because I needed alcohol, stat.

We started off with 6 types of oysters which were all delicious.  I wasn't as impressed by the shredded horseradish as Chef Damo was.  It was a bit...I don't know, hairy?  Plus, the rape face Chef Damo was giving me during the oyster course was beginning to make me nervous.

By the time the entrees arrived I was able to relax and enjoy my second glass of wine and the view, since the feeding frenzy family had finally left.  I was looking forward to a light dinner, I had ordered a shrimp and scallop skewer and for my sides a tomato and basil salad and sauteed veggies.  I really wanted the  cheesy scalloped potatoes but I was trying to be proactively healthy since I was already eyeing the desert menu.

Well, the universe was against me because I ended up with the cheesy scalloped potatoes instead of vegetable medley.  Did I correct the server and send back my carbo-licious delight for the veggies?  I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.  The potatoes and salad were great.  The main part of my dish however, was not.  These shrimp and scallops were so tiny a toothpick would have been a substantial skewer.  I looked over at Chef Damo's plate and commented that last time I checked sea bass did not look and taste exactly like overcooked swordfish.  The state of our entrees was pushing me closer and closer to the dessert menu.

Chef Damo and I dove (literally dove, because there was a lake of butter) into the peach crisp ala mode.  This dessert was not lacking in taste, but was prepared with the skill of a 10 year old in an Easy Bake oven.  Butter, sugar, peaches and flour are not the worst combo in the world, but it should have been called "death by diabetes."